Dale Winton Lights Blackpool’s Traditional Wicker Man
The winter solstice came early this year when, due to a timetabling clash with the panto season, Dale Winton had to light Blackpool’s traditional illuminations in September. The ceremony is usually held annually each December to ask the publicity gods to provide another bountiful Summer Season, but it had particular significance this year as Blackpool faces the reality of diminishing visitors, acts which have failed for a second successive year, and the Tory Party conference — usually seen as a time of great fertility — moving away from the resort.
These problems were far from people’s minds as they gathered to watch the ceremony, and from the moment he was dragged before the expectant crowd, it was clear that Dale was delighted to be at the festival. Though he looked a mite uncertain as to his function as he donned the white ceremonial robes, it was clear his illusions were dispelled by the time a large bearded yokel deckchair attendant was tying him into the forty five foot wicker man. The presenter then added to the centuries old tradition by condemning the community as heretics and shouting: ‘I damn you all to bad American remakes, my loves!’ It sent the crowd of 25,000 into raptures. Led by local dignitary, Arch Druid Bernie Clifton, they began to sing the traditional folk songs. Meanwhile, Dale Winton stubbornly chose to sing ‘The Lord’s My Shepard’ but this was soon drowned out as the illuminations came on and the smell of slowly roasting pork, chicken, and Christian, filled the air, bringing to close another successful evening in Blackpool’s long history of providing popular family entertainment.
