The government has been thrown into turmoil as both religious and secular pressure groups look to exploit mixed messages over public expressions of faith. A week after Jack Straw admitted asking visitors to his surgery if they’d like to remove their veils, Peter Hain has described as “loopy” calls for for the banning of explicitly religious symbolism from across Britain. ‘We feel that the crescent moon is not suitable for the kind of open, tolerant society we have here in the UK,’ said Dr. Martin C. Sheepdip, leader of the pressure group, Stop Abusing the Moon. ‘In a truly secular nation, there should be no need for such overt displays of religious belief and we are looking into ways of making the government block out the moon for the periods it is in its crescent phrase.’
Patrick Moore, Britain’s foremost monocled astronomer, was quick to defend Earth’s satellite. ‘This is intolerable,’ he said, ‘the Moon has been up there a good deal longer than any religion and it will be there a good deal longer too.’
Mr. Moore’s remarks brought a swift condemnation from senior figures of many different faiths that use the moon in their iconography. ‘The BBC should not be making a program that is so obviously meant to offend religious sensibilities,’ said Felicity Twain, senior member of the Church of the Full Moon. Demanding that the BBC cancel The Sky at Night, the Arch-Dairymaid added: ‘This programme espouses nothing but religious hatred against those of use who believe in the milky goodness of our celestial cheese mother. This is religious lactose intolerance.’
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5 Responses to “Calls For Government to Ban Religious Symbolism in UK Skies”
Absolutely true. The ruling will also affect anything with a cycle linked to the moon. Wolfmen will be moving to a five week cycle and the tides will do shift work.
Oskar, you’re so right. Sorry for the error in the report. The government have indeed confirmed that all sufferers of lycanthropy will be given government grants to relocate themselves and that Brian May has already opened his own sanctuary in the Netherlands where he’s already a popular tourist attraction at every full moon.
October 16th, 2006 at 2:25 pm
Brings new meaning to the concept of howling at the moon…
October 17th, 2006 at 2:20 pm
So as a consqquence do men have to stop being from the moon and act like rational human beings?? (ooh I am such a little demon!)
E.
October 17th, 2006 at 3:16 pm
Absolutely true. The ruling will also affect anything with a cycle linked to the moon. Wolfmen will be moving to a five week cycle and the tides will do shift work.
October 23rd, 2006 at 4:20 pm
David, infact wolfmen will be banned throughout Britain altogether because they use religious simbolism for their rituals!
October 23rd, 2006 at 11:24 pm
Oskar, you’re so right. Sorry for the error in the report. The government have indeed confirmed that all sufferers of lycanthropy will be given government grants to relocate themselves and that Brian May has already opened his own sanctuary in the Netherlands where he’s already a popular tourist attraction at every full moon.