Ex-Tory leader, Michael Howard, has been interviewed by police as part of the cash for honours enquiry. Howard was interviewed by P.C. Jonathan Harker in his home over the weekend, though the police have been quick to emphasise that Mr. Howard is not himself under investigation. ‘Mr. Howard simply answered questions,’ said P.C. Harker, ‘but his being interviewed is purely routine and we’d like to be sure that nobody makes any false conclusions regarding our enquiries nor Mr. Howard’s ability to walk on the ceiling.’

This is not the first time that Michael Howard has been in the news recently. He figured prominently in a top ten list of the worst satire to be found on the internet. Cheap ’something of the night’ photos were voted the public’s least favourite gag followed by jokes about James Blunt and Jamie Oliver. Speaking anonymously, one would-be humorist admitted: ‘I know Michael Howard has been done as Dracula a thousand times before, but it never fails to make me smile. And it has been a funny few days… I hope my sense of humour returns tomorrow.’

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